I am a little ferret and I like to slide through cracks
In older brownstone buildings and then plan savage attacks
On the population that so innocently thinks
We are harmless critters, and not homicidal finks.
We ferrets are so feral that we form into large gangs
That roam the city nightly wreaking havoc with our fangs.
We knock off banks and liquor stores, then divvy up the loot,
Then sneak back to our owners, who are never too astute.
We ain’t forgot Giuliani and the hurtful things he said;
We dug him up and played a game of soccer with his head.
And before we fly at you to rip out your pink throat,
Please remember we are NOT a weasel or a stoat!