Talking Carrots.


Welcome to our testing farm, where we raise many crops

That somehow are not regulated by the Fed’ral cops.

No agency molests us as we grow a weird concoction

of plants that we can put up any time for bids at auction.


Loopholes are a lovely thing that we embrace with passion;

And with the gridlock in D.C. they are now in fashion.

We do not need more scientists to modify our fruit;

What we need are lawyers who can regulations boot.


So try a talking carrot or a radish that can fly,

And don’t forget our cukes that taste like fresh-baked apple pie.

Sadly, we have discontinued nurturing much fennel;

It tends to run amok and bite, unless it’s in a kennel.